Post by Richard Robinson on Dec 4, 2009 14:08:19 GMT -5
Earlier today I was catching the Metra Train and a Young Woman handed me a piece of paper, I want to share what she gave me with you.
"My Testimony"
Hello! My name is Katrina Jackson and this letter that you have just received is actually, -,MY Testimony on Paper". God gave me this idea to share with you in hopes that it will bring about some help and life changing decisions. When l finally got the concept of being a witness for the Lord l was u hit confused on how it was going to come about. And just the other day the Lord spoke tome and requested of me to put my testimony on paper. See with in my church home (In the comfort of our four walls) my testimony have been heard by many. l believe it helped a few and still is helping some others. But God is calling to us to reach outside of the comfort of our own. He has equipped us with the power and ability to reach the helpless. So with that said I am going to share the goodness of the Lord with you and how he saved me from the hands of the enemy over and over again!
Well it all begin sincerely for me in 2007, (notice l said sincerely). l was basically seeking something more than what l was receiving in life at that point. Now I'm not going to lie to you and say that I knew what that was, but the feeling of emptiness was truly there. l first thought it was the lack of success that kept following me around every where that l vent. So I entered school! And soon realized that wasn't an answer to my problem. l sat around days on end trying to hide this emptiness from the company that I kept. For some reason l felt like l had to please everyone else while my life was slowly drafting away. 1, myself tried to make sense of what was happening to me, but I couldn't. One day I was sitting and thinking about how I could better my life for me and my children and I thought I came to the conclusion that we needed to start going to church (LOIS). (How many people know God is u set-up artist!) So eventually I went to my then husband and started to talk to him about finding a church home. Needless to say he agreed in words but not in action. So with my constant talk of being a part of a church and bettering our lives, we started looking for a church home. Well in looking for a church l requested to my husband that I really didn't want to attend a huge church. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with huge churches I just had a fear of getting lost in the crowd and eventually ended up like most big churchgoers; just there to church just to say they go to church. But for some reason every time we ventured out to visit a church it was a big church. Which caused me to draw back. So after a couple of failed visits my then husband remembered the church he grew up in and we decided that we should visit there. Now the first visit l was a little nervous cause of course I was giving background on some of the people there. But after the service was over and we had returned home, I felt the need to go back. So I followed my heart and returned that next Sunday. And the Sunday after that we joined. Now I'm a show you how God's plan is not our plan. That following week after we joined this church, my then husband got sent to jail for some things he did in the past. But I didn't let that stop me from going to church, because I was under the impression that the enemy was just mad because of the steps that we had made to serve God. Not knowing that God was setting me up! See when l married that man it was not ordained by God, we were together three months and truthfully did not know each other. But before 2007 we lived the same life so we mistook lust for love and went with it. So all the while he was in jail (4 months) I was sincerely seeking the Lord and was lead to believe my then husband was doing the same in jail. My faith and strength grew stronger in the Lord. He filled me with his precious Holy Ghost and molded me into anew creature. Now don't get me wrong, things was rough nothing happens over night! happened l went through a period of time of not having a income (he blessed me with a job), not knowing where my kids and l next meal was coming from (he gave me favor), not having hot water to clean myself because the gas was off (he blessed me to move), and not understanding what and why exactly theses things were happening to us. Still I continued to trust God. I started burying myself in the bible and attended every church service that was available. So God start really working with me and I was completely convinced that everything was going to be alright. Until my then husband got out of Jail in Sept of that year and a week later my life begin to fall. See because l knew that I needed to be a Proverbs 31 wife l was trying to ignore all the signs that the lord was trying to show
about that man. l had made up in my mind that !was going to stick by his side no matter *hat. Now don't get me wrong, once again the bible do mate that we are suppose to honor our husbands but where I fell at is God didn't give me that husband. I took something from my pas* life that I was suppose to leave behind and tried to force it into my future life. And true enough the enemy had his way. During all the fighting and confusion I was still trying to hold on to my faith in God not even knowing the enemy had a grip on our situation so tight it wasn’t funny. I went from having a place to live to moving three times in three months. At one point I was Homeless. But I thought I was fighting the enemy when all the while he was fighting me and winning. I tried prayer, I tried counseling and all God wanted me to do was let go. It took that devil six months to make me want to give up! (Not a long time at all right) He caused confusion between me and my kids. He convinced me that it was ok to keep everything to myself and suffer in silence. Well that suffering in silence lead me to try and commit suicide on March 18th 2008. In my endeavor of trying to commit suicide I consumed 24 painkillers, 3 Ibuprofen tablets and a pint of 100 proof Gin. My reason for trying this was because I thought I had become the reason why nobody wanted to be with me, I thought I had become the reason why my kids were rebellious, I thought I was the reason why I couldn’t find a job and was fresh out of college. I was lead to believe all this because I was closing myself up in my dark room, the enemy had the opportunity to show me my life on the big screen, but of course he only showed me the bad parts. I started to feel Like a failure and justed wanted to end it all, so I did, at least that’s what I tried to do. At midnight I heard the police bamming on my door, apparently they had received a call from someone whom was concerned about my well being. The Police had an ambulance with them and I was transported to the hospital otherwise I would have died that night.
When I realized what I had done, I felt Stupid. I was very hurt and confused, because I couldn’t understand how that could have happened. I thought I had the right prayer life, I thought I read my bible like I was supposed too and guess what I did! But I wasn’t listening to God, I was listening to man and allowing the enemy to trick me into believing that I was ok and that I was doing the right thing. So after spending time in a mental hospital and doing some soul searching and listening to God here I am doing the Lords work.
Now although this testimony ends here, this is just the beginning. Believe me this will not be the last time you hear from me. Even within this testimony there is more to be told and I am a willing and a Yielding vessel seeking to do the work of the Lord. After reading this testimony, my hopes and prayers are that it reaches someone and that you pas* it on so it can reach someone else. With all else said, Be Blessed and continue to seek the Lord
"My Testimony"
Hello! My name is Katrina Jackson and this letter that you have just received is actually, -,MY Testimony on Paper". God gave me this idea to share with you in hopes that it will bring about some help and life changing decisions. When l finally got the concept of being a witness for the Lord l was u hit confused on how it was going to come about. And just the other day the Lord spoke tome and requested of me to put my testimony on paper. See with in my church home (In the comfort of our four walls) my testimony have been heard by many. l believe it helped a few and still is helping some others. But God is calling to us to reach outside of the comfort of our own. He has equipped us with the power and ability to reach the helpless. So with that said I am going to share the goodness of the Lord with you and how he saved me from the hands of the enemy over and over again!
Well it all begin sincerely for me in 2007, (notice l said sincerely). l was basically seeking something more than what l was receiving in life at that point. Now I'm not going to lie to you and say that I knew what that was, but the feeling of emptiness was truly there. l first thought it was the lack of success that kept following me around every where that l vent. So I entered school! And soon realized that wasn't an answer to my problem. l sat around days on end trying to hide this emptiness from the company that I kept. For some reason l felt like l had to please everyone else while my life was slowly drafting away. 1, myself tried to make sense of what was happening to me, but I couldn't. One day I was sitting and thinking about how I could better my life for me and my children and I thought I came to the conclusion that we needed to start going to church (LOIS). (How many people know God is u set-up artist!) So eventually I went to my then husband and started to talk to him about finding a church home. Needless to say he agreed in words but not in action. So with my constant talk of being a part of a church and bettering our lives, we started looking for a church home. Well in looking for a church l requested to my husband that I really didn't want to attend a huge church. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with huge churches I just had a fear of getting lost in the crowd and eventually ended up like most big churchgoers; just there to church just to say they go to church. But for some reason every time we ventured out to visit a church it was a big church. Which caused me to draw back. So after a couple of failed visits my then husband remembered the church he grew up in and we decided that we should visit there. Now the first visit l was a little nervous cause of course I was giving background on some of the people there. But after the service was over and we had returned home, I felt the need to go back. So I followed my heart and returned that next Sunday. And the Sunday after that we joined. Now I'm a show you how God's plan is not our plan. That following week after we joined this church, my then husband got sent to jail for some things he did in the past. But I didn't let that stop me from going to church, because I was under the impression that the enemy was just mad because of the steps that we had made to serve God. Not knowing that God was setting me up! See when l married that man it was not ordained by God, we were together three months and truthfully did not know each other. But before 2007 we lived the same life so we mistook lust for love and went with it. So all the while he was in jail (4 months) I was sincerely seeking the Lord and was lead to believe my then husband was doing the same in jail. My faith and strength grew stronger in the Lord. He filled me with his precious Holy Ghost and molded me into anew creature. Now don't get me wrong, things was rough nothing happens over night! happened l went through a period of time of not having a income (he blessed me with a job), not knowing where my kids and l next meal was coming from (he gave me favor), not having hot water to clean myself because the gas was off (he blessed me to move), and not understanding what and why exactly theses things were happening to us. Still I continued to trust God. I started burying myself in the bible and attended every church service that was available. So God start really working with me and I was completely convinced that everything was going to be alright. Until my then husband got out of Jail in Sept of that year and a week later my life begin to fall. See because l knew that I needed to be a Proverbs 31 wife l was trying to ignore all the signs that the lord was trying to show
about that man. l had made up in my mind that !was going to stick by his side no matter *hat. Now don't get me wrong, once again the bible do mate that we are suppose to honor our husbands but where I fell at is God didn't give me that husband. I took something from my pas* life that I was suppose to leave behind and tried to force it into my future life. And true enough the enemy had his way. During all the fighting and confusion I was still trying to hold on to my faith in God not even knowing the enemy had a grip on our situation so tight it wasn’t funny. I went from having a place to live to moving three times in three months. At one point I was Homeless. But I thought I was fighting the enemy when all the while he was fighting me and winning. I tried prayer, I tried counseling and all God wanted me to do was let go. It took that devil six months to make me want to give up! (Not a long time at all right) He caused confusion between me and my kids. He convinced me that it was ok to keep everything to myself and suffer in silence. Well that suffering in silence lead me to try and commit suicide on March 18th 2008. In my endeavor of trying to commit suicide I consumed 24 painkillers, 3 Ibuprofen tablets and a pint of 100 proof Gin. My reason for trying this was because I thought I had become the reason why nobody wanted to be with me, I thought I had become the reason why my kids were rebellious, I thought I was the reason why I couldn’t find a job and was fresh out of college. I was lead to believe all this because I was closing myself up in my dark room, the enemy had the opportunity to show me my life on the big screen, but of course he only showed me the bad parts. I started to feel Like a failure and justed wanted to end it all, so I did, at least that’s what I tried to do. At midnight I heard the police bamming on my door, apparently they had received a call from someone whom was concerned about my well being. The Police had an ambulance with them and I was transported to the hospital otherwise I would have died that night.
When I realized what I had done, I felt Stupid. I was very hurt and confused, because I couldn’t understand how that could have happened. I thought I had the right prayer life, I thought I read my bible like I was supposed too and guess what I did! But I wasn’t listening to God, I was listening to man and allowing the enemy to trick me into believing that I was ok and that I was doing the right thing. So after spending time in a mental hospital and doing some soul searching and listening to God here I am doing the Lords work.
Now although this testimony ends here, this is just the beginning. Believe me this will not be the last time you hear from me. Even within this testimony there is more to be told and I am a willing and a Yielding vessel seeking to do the work of the Lord. After reading this testimony, my hopes and prayers are that it reaches someone and that you pas* it on so it can reach someone else. With all else said, Be Blessed and continue to seek the Lord
